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About Deviant Tegan Calista FrayFemale/United States Recent Activity
Deviant for 6 Years
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L+V: Keeping Me Attached to Sanity
I stood alone in the dressing room, looking around thoughtfully. Painting was just an introduction, now we were getting started on the real thing. We'd begin blocking today, and I had nothing to do at the moment. The boys were out on stage rehearsing fight scenes, and nobody needed a Juliet standing around and getting in the way. I pulled my hand through my hair as I looked into the full-length mirror. I felt comfortable in the dressing room by myself, not as out of place as I did in the wings. As I did with Erica around.
I began to prowl through the rack of costumes, wondering to myself how I'd gotten into this mess. Yeah, I wanted to be an actress, and it was too late to go back now. I was terrified, I was stuck, I was-
I almost jumped out of my skin.
"Oh, it's you," I said, relieved at the sight of Mei's face. "I didn't know you were coming today."
"I'm not technically supposed to be here," she said, "Since I'm just a dancer. But I thought you might need me." She hopped up
:iconloveactually10:LoveActually10 2 4
L+V: Let That One Go
"How can you POSSIBLY take this game seriously?" I asked, watching the tiny white ball bouncy back and forth across the green table. Neither of the twins answered me, just stayed focused on their game.
"Athletes," Sarah said. "I'll never understand."
Having won the point, Allie looked over at her, giving a snort of disdain. "You only say that because I annihilated you."
Sarah grinned lopsidedly. "Maybe. But I still can't understand being so into ping pong."
I stretched my legs out in front of my and studied my lilac toenails. I was sitting on the hood of Allie and Abbey's minivan, making an effort to dispel my boredom. The ping pong table is in the garage, which sort of smells like gasoline and dog, and it's not my favorite place in this house. I much prefer the plush carpet of the living room, or the bag of Ghirardelli chocolate chips that can always be found in the kitchen cabinet. As Sarah leaped up next to me, I leaned into her with my shoulder. She gave me a fond nudge back.
:iconloveactually10:LoveActually10 2 1
L+V: Washing Paintbrushes
That Friday night, I crashed at Sarah's house, and I was sitting cross-legged in front of her as she braided my hair, studying my fingernails and listening to Paramore. She was waxing eloquent about some boy she had met, and I wasn't really paying attention.
"Eh?" I said, pulling myself away from the pressing issue that was correcting my cuticles. (First world problems are still problems, okay?)
"Why can't gays and lesbians just get together?" she asked me, the tone of her voice suggesting that this question was very real to her.
"Uh... I dunno, Sarah-Bear. I don't think it works like that." I furrowed my eyebrows and looked up at her. "Why do you ask?"
"Well... I'm not sure. I've just been thinking about it. That girl, Erica, she's-"
"No!" I snapped. "She's not."
"Whoa, T," Sarah said. "Careful there."
"She has a boyfriend, that's all," I said. "No big. Just saying."
"You know my dad does exorcisms, right?"
She wasn't making that up. Her father was a penteco
:iconloveactually10:LoveActually10 3 10
L+V: A Lot to Think About
Actually, it wasn't as bad as it could have been. The script itself was a modernized Romeo and Juliet that made me want to scream at points, but it was more or less okay. I suppose people weren't exactly open and talkative with me, but they were all at least polite, and began to smile at me in an almost friendly was after I preformed my monologue.
I was a little out of breath as I exited the stage, heart pounding with adrenaline. I was the last to perform, and we were all signing off and going home. The theater erupted with a buzz of chatter, the group laughing and yelling across the room to each other. I felt out of place, that much was true.
But as I looked around, I couldn't help feeling a strange warmth spread across me. It was obvious that these people loved each other, and that I wouldn't be hard pressed to be as loved as any of them. That was a strange realization, that these people would take anyone in, love anyone who bothered to need it.
"Not bad."
I almost jumped out of my s
:iconloveactually10:LoveActually10 7 3
L+V: Theater
I sat in the middle of the floor, surrounded by ancient, hideous tile flooring, looking pensively up at the ceiling. Mei sat across from me, her glittery eyes taking in the common room of Silverado High. We sat at a safe distance from where the stairdwellers gathered in their little alcove. I drew my knees up under my chin and gave her a pleading look.
"Please, Mei, I am begging you. Do not make me do this."
She glared at me. "Tegan. You want to be an actress."
I rocked back and forth, eyeing the people with more than my fair share of trepidation. "Well, yeah..."
"And you want to act."
"Didn't I just say that?"
"So you're auditioning for the play."
"Look at them!" I said, my voice shooting up to an octave barely audible by the human ear. "They... they're not like me. They won't like me. They'll eat me, or something."
I'd been avoiding the stairs since my first day at Silverado. The people that hung out there were terrifying - the drama group, as I had come to find out.
:iconloveactually10:LoveActually10 9 6
Leather and Velvet: Prologue
Her name is Erica, and she will never read this.
But I don't care. I'm writing this for me, really, in the hopes that I can sort myself out. Unlikely, but worth a shot. And maybe she'll feel it, somehow, maybe she'll know.
Her eyes... her eyes are black in the shadows backstage and the color of honey in the spotlights. I know it's cliché, but those eyes look right through you. I feel like she sees my soul.
And there are so many reasons why I shouldn't be in love with her.
I'm a typical all-American teenage blonde. Honestly, I look like a Barbie, and that's partially my own fault. I like clothes and things that sparkle and big sunglasses. I was raised by loving, conservative Christian parents who think that free will is an ancient concept that should be beaten down at all costs. And to make matters worse, I'm an only child.
It seems to bother people that I'm single. "Why don't you have a boyfriend?" I get asked constantly. Well, the boys keep asking me out and I keep shooting them
:iconloveactually10:LoveActually10 16 11

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  • Listening to: Maroon 5
Okay, guys.

I'M BACK. And now I shall be posting. Once a week? I hope?


Tegan Calista Fray
United States
:bulletpink: Music
:bulletpink: Writing
:bulletpink: Shoes
:bulletpink: Being myself
:bulletpink: Chocolate
:bulletpink: My home in Paradise (more like being so close to Las Vegas)

:bulletred: Being judged
:bulletred: Men (well, the straight ones that hit on me incessantly. Jerks. Sorry boys.)
:bulletred: Avocados
:bulletred: Writer's block

I don't bite, so feel free to talk to me. ^.^ I love meeting new people.

Current Residence: Paradise - right outside Las Vegas, Nevada
Favourite genre of music: I like everything, really


LoveActually10 has started a donation pool!
5 / 636
I usually hate it when people do this. >.<
Please. *wince*
But the point is, I really want to upgrade to premium, SO, if you should feel the deep desire to give me a few points, it would be appreciated. I'll give you a llama as a thank-you and promise to prowl around your page. I might even watch you if I like what I see. :) And you'd have my undying gratitude, of course, and a feature once I reach my goal!

You must be logged in to donate.
  • :icondraw-wiz:
    Donated Jun 15, 2011, 7:58:16 PM



Add a Comment:
featherpen13 Featured By Owner Jan 19, 2013  Student Filmographer
I feel like I oddly know you...

Your writing is fantastically relatable~ It's been almost a year, but I'm deeply interested in what else happens :meow:
Lintu47 Featured By Owner Jun 8, 2012  Hobbyist Photographer
Thank you for your support, it's much appreciated :huggle:
AvianHartridge Featured By Owner Feb 3, 2012  Student Writer
Thanks for the fave back in April
sorry for not saying something sooner but I just got around to go through my notifications
roxilove10 Featured By Owner Jan 16, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
...Would it be totally creepy if I told you you seem to be living my life in another place?

Seriously, this sounds exactly like what happened to me, so far.

Whoa. Your description of the girl Erica sounds just like a girl I met in that same situation... wow.
LoveActually10 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2012
Whoa, that is AMAZING! Thanks for all the faves!

I read some of your poetry, and wow, girl! That's some pretty good stuff! :)

Mind if I advertise you in a journal?
roxilove10 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2012  Hobbyist Writer
Exposure is always nice. ;) And I'll do the same for you once I get some watchers...
LoveActually10 Featured By Owner Jan 18, 2012
Awesome. You will! <3
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